the idiots' lantern

This section utilises a star rating system much like that in Heat Magazine to rate emissions. These range from one to five, with the provision of an unter category for the very worst offenders. Programmes in this final category will be afforded no stars, which means they are the living embodiment of shite.


*Ideal fodder for that lumpen "water-cooler" moment. "Go to bed, spotty."
**Almost certainly starring Michelle Collins. Best avoided. "Do I not like that."
***Good script probably poorly realised. But worth watching. "I'd buy that for a dollar."
****Splendid fare. Easy to become effusive about after several pints. "Nonsense, officer, I've only had a couple of ales."
*****Top notch television. A reaffirmation of the point of being alive. "Yul Bruyner's noggin."